My name is A.L Ryan and this is my blog. This will be a place for journal entries, erotica, and occasional rants and musings. This blog exists because I used to write, then I stopped. I used to do a lot of things and then stopped. Maybe you did, too.
As I grew up and went through life, I chipped away pieces of myself, smoothing my edges and diminishing myself to please my parents, my teachers, my friends, my employers, my lovers, and I had nearly forgotten those pieces of my soul even existed. I’m one of the lucky ones, though. One of the ones who is fortunate enough to stumble onto the right people, the people who want you to be all of yourself, the people who have cracked my heart wide open. It’s terrifying and dizzying, sometimes I feel like I’ve been scrubbed raw and I’m bleeding, but the forgotten things–the old joys and delights, the abandoned hobbies, the youthful aspirations, and the ambitions I left behind, the desires I kept secret for fear of judgment–those forgotten pieces of me are coming back. And I am crying tears of gratitude because I am remembering what it felt like when I was me.
I choose myself from now on. I will not have an unlived life. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you!